Oh, so today during morning training you talked to me hell loads. What a sudden change in attitude! Apparently you actually SAW me at training today. Well, then it must've been a special day eh? Especially since I never get noticed by you.

But don't think I don't know why you talked to me today. Sure, I was friendly and all. Laughing when I should. Answering your questions. Bear in mind I was putting on a false front just as much as you are. Just because no one from your clique turned up for morning training doesn't mean you can buy me over with your friendliness. I know it's because I am the only one you could turn to. Besides, who else would tell you what drill to do next?

Since you already decided to be a bitch, please be a proper one. You don't like me, then stay that way. Don't treat me like a friend when you have no one else to turn to. I won't fall for it.

But then again, I guess making me your substitute friend makes you all the more a bitch. Wow, I never knew someone could be that good at something. You should quit swimming and turn to bitching. Oh, right. Sorry my bad, your number 1 sport has always been bitching. Swimming's 2nd. You just so happened to be not so bad at it.

What the fuck people like you are the reasons I have a middle finger.

No mood for tag replies because I have a Geog test on Friday, and my sitting partner who borrowed my notes didn't turn up for Geog today so I didn't get it back. If she doesn't turn up tmr, I swear I'm never gonna lend her my notes again.

FUCK YOU BITCHES.
0 Comments


Today was a normal day. Didn't do anything out of the ordinary.

Anyway, the main purpose of this post is to note down my thoughts for the day. Today I've had quite a few memorable thoughts that I felt should be recorded down somewhere so that I won't forget it.

I was in the shower and I recalled the Alyssa I was a few years ago, probably 3-4 years ago. I was still relatively young.. 10-11 years old. Those years were the peak of my swimming career. I knew it was because I never gave up. Be it training or competition, I always gave it my all. It didn't matter what the set was. 5x100, or 10x100, or even 20x100, I would go all out. When I think of it now, I don't even remember why I did that. It's like it just came naturally to me. During those years, I never once thought of giving up halfway. No matter how tired I was, I always pushed on. Always stayed strong.

I wonder where that Alyssa went.

The Alyssa now (which is the current me posting this post) somehow has lost her fighting spirit. I don't know why I'm like this now. But it's like once I know something isn't worth working hard for, I automatically stop working hard for it. If I kept trying and trying and trying but still don't get anything out of it, I give up. That's what's natural to me now. Put an obstacle in front of me and I'll just walk away instead of trying to make it through. I can't help but wonder HOW I could have never given up in the past.

I finally came up with a conclusion.

As we grow older, we learn. In fact, that's what's growing up is all about. We learn more math, english, chinese, science. We even learn new subjects like geography and history. Apart from school-related learning, we also learn how to be responsible, be more disciplined and whatnot. So, basically, learning helps you to move forward in life. Everyone likes to learn new skills.

And me? Well, I've learnt how to give up.

Tag replies!
Justin: Yep I've read the update and seen the pictures. Hahah glad you guys had a good time (:

Jem: Aww gee, thanks! :D I know the cap is duper cute. How could you not watch Step Up 1?! D: You HAVE to okay? And cheer up! I know what it's like to be like you. I'm always here. And I miss the days where we would stay up late on the com to talk to each other (: Missing you always!

Amandakhoo: HMPH FINE BE THAT WAYYYY! BLEAH ><

Claireteng: Who's who!? Mas Selamat? Hahahahahaha it's a secret ;D

Mas Selamat: Yo man, nope I haven't. Why do you reckon I should?

Coolest: RUNNING IS GOOD but tiring! My legs are dead and wobbly! I can't even walk down the steps properly now -.- I should've never stopped running in the first place!

Liying: LOL sorry my bad. I forgot you wanted a REAL secret admirer, not a fake one. AND YES STEP UP 2 ROCKS :D
0 Comments


Just got back from running around the neighbourhood with my sis. The route was quite tough cause it had a lot of hills to run up >.< I was damn tired after the first round but then I decided to run another round since I seriously need to get back in shape. And in case you were wondering, no, I don't consider "round" as a shape

Hahah okay. I didn't update yesterday, and I'm duper proud of myself
I've been updating my blog everyday but yesterday I finally decided to skip blogging. Yay my addiction is dying
Yesterday I was more or less occupied with the tv. American Idol! Hahah I'm so sad David Archuleta didn't get comments that were as good as last week's But I'm confident he'll make it through, so better luck to him next week!

Training yesterday was awful. I feel super sad for Sam. It's like no one respects him. That's just plain mean. I felt like punching the people who were laughing at him when he tried to discipline us. But I couldn't, so I did the most I could do. That was swim the programme properly. Yep. That's what I did. I just did my own stuff and heck about whatever anyone else was doing.

This morning Sam was in charge of us again. We swam at Lloyd Esmore. I like swimming there, because the pool was indoors, and it's of a normal length of 25m. Lol. And of course, the best part of all is that training there meant training starts at 7.15am! Whee! But what really annoyed me was that I woke up at 5.10am this morning and thought it was time to get up for training


The set was freaking tiring today. 2k Pre-comp + 6x (3x50) + 600 swim down. Omg you do NOT want to try 6 sets of 3x50. It's tremendously exhausting. Especially when you go all out for every single one of them. The last 3 was dive and although my lane was the only lane out of 3 lanes that didn't have a diving board, I swam good times. Overall, I'm quite satisfied.

Nothing to say now. I guess I'll just end off with tag replies!

Tag replies!
Amandakhoo: OH FINE I'm not trusting you anymore! Hahahahah! (:

Coolest: LOL no lah I don't need to deceive myself because I already know how slow I am (: Not because I know I'm fast HAHA! Anyway it's not good to deceive yourself because you'll just get more disappointed when the results show at a competition, right?

Liying: Of course I remember lah. My imaginary secret admirer (:< Oh, wouldn't you LOVE to have one of your own.. HAHA What the hell.

Rachelyu: Gee, thanks man! <3 LOL ART IS THE BEST THING OF YOUR LIFE ONLY IF YOU'RE GOOD AT IT. And like duh you are so I guess art is the best thing of your life. I are jealous Teehee!

Aliciatan: YOU SCISSORS I ROCK. HAHAH YEAH MAN I ROCK :D LOL I STLL WIN YOU! And chill dude, your name IS already in tag replies (: Hope you feel special ;D

So long!
0 Comments


The day started out with the usual morning training of the usual programme of 4 sets of 20x33 drills (If you don't find it boring, I suggest you swim it 10 times a week).

Just this time, it didn't turn out quite the same.

After the freestyle drills set, it was fly drills. I was merrily just doing what I was expected to do, then Gary called me and he tried fixing my technique. Said something about me breathing too early. So both of us had a hard time trying to fix my stroke. I was trying damn hard to comprehend how to breathe not-so-early. What made it worse was that the drill Gary designed to help me correct my breathing was super duper weird. I don't know if I had been doing it wrong all the way, but it certainly felt like it. Although Gary told me I was doing it the right way, I couldn't help but be doubtful and think, "Huh! Are you sure!?" Hahah.

Then it came to the application part. After Gary was sort-of-sure that my breathing was a lot better than what it was, he told me to try swimming 2 strokes with the new breathing technique. I did what I was told to. I did it a couple of times, and then I stopped to look at Gary to see if he wanted to say anything.

Gary was smiling like a kid and he was clapping -.- Hahaha honestly my first reaction was, "What in the world is Gary doing!?" And then he said that I finally got it right, and then I was super duper happy. I did it a few more times, and Gary couldn't stop smiling.

As usual, Gary got carried away and then he started rattling on about my plans for the future. He told me I didn't have to do any IM events or breaststroke events for the whole of this season YIPEE! But damn, that means no 100IM! Nevermind I might ask Gary to let me swim that heh.

He also said that I'd be focusing on 50, 100 and 200 free, 50 and 100 back, and 50 fly. Haha nothing unusual. Those have been my main events since forever. But he also mentioned that I'd have to swim 400 and 800 free, as well as 200 back during the not-so-important meets. Zzz.

Anyway I'm just so happy that I finally got my breathing for fly right. Lol apparently Gary was so happy this morning that he asked me to go over to Westwave Aquatic Centre tmr afternoon and Saturday morning to train because he'll be there for Olympic trials. He even gave my dad his pass so that we could train there. Like omg lah I can watch the heats and finals of Olypmic trials without paying yay!

This has also given me more determination (: I plan to do my own exercise every weekend. Like on Saturday afternoons and Sunday mornings I can play tennis/cycle/run. I'd most probably run every Sunday morning, starting from this week because I'm gaining wayyyyy too much weight. Haven't been training hard for the past month or so because we had to taper for NAGs, then there was NAGs, then people are away at Olypmic trials so we're doing drills.. Plus I haven't done gym work for like forever! I think it was running steps that kept my weight from increasing. I seriously need to get fitter.

On second thoughts, maybe this is the reason why I have been gaining weight.


):

Hmm what happened in school today. Apparently my sis claims I was called for a swim meeting today at the pool in school but then I missed it out because no one read out the announcements in class today! Ugh! And I never expected to be in the announcement, because I missed the school swim meet and didn't get to go on the school swim team. Since when did they find me? Hmm :/ Will check things out tmr.

Uh, okay got nothing left to say. I'm most probably gonna get a new phone so yeah I'm pretty happy. LOL How could I have so many ups and downs in a week?! It's crazy man, who knows tmr I might have a horrible day -.-

Heaven, please don't make me look like an idiot.

Tag replies!
Amandakhoo: OI WHO ASK ME WHAT?! You were the one who came up with the stupid prank hahahahahah!

Aliciatan: HAHAHAH WHY IS EVERYONE SO HAPPY THEY PASSED CHINESE!? Amandayim told me the exact same thing online last time LMAO. And don't blame Mas Selamat, I'm just so much nicer than you HAHAH just kidding! :P Plus I'm so pro I can tell the diff between you and aliciafong (:< Don't mention the name Brandon Lim again!!! >.<

Aliciafong: Hahah don't need already, cause she invited me to read her blog LOL. I had to fight the urge to spam her tagboard man..

Nurul: NURUL! SHHH!!!! KEEP QUIET ABOUT IT HAHAHAHA.

Claireteng: I'm sure lah! What crap. Your 50 fly was like how much faster than me last time lah! And duh Aliciatan would loveee to know who he is *Grins*

Cass: Hey cass! (: Thanks a lot! Hope you had fun in Vietnam (:
0 Comments


Holey moley Nineteen Minutes by Jodi Picoult is a cool ass book. But the ending didn't take me by surprise as much as the ending of Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card did :/ Anyway, Nineteen Minutes is a good book for teenagers our age. I really liked the diary parts; they really meant something to me.

I was in the library during lunchtime today in school and I was randomly browsing for a book to borrow because I was at my last chapter of Nineteen Minutes already. Guess what! I found the book I've been dying to read: Ender's Shadow! It's a sequel to a book I've finished reading couple of months back: Ender's Game. Zomg I went to the public library to look for that book but it was unavailable! Never thought I'd find it in the school library. Hahaha the student librarian even said, "Omg I LOVE this book" when she helped me with the borrowing procedures :D

No training, what can I say. No training this morning and Dad couldn't fetch me to HPK to train in the afternoon. Normally, I would've gone to Laser Mt Eden to train but Glenn said he'll be away with most of the squad at Olypmic Trials. God-dammit why did everyone make it except me!? Sorry digressing.

School was okay. We had some stupid fire drill which wasn't like a fire drill at all -.- I found out I got "de-graded" from an Excellence to a Merit for my Chem paper because of one question: What are the similarities and differences of a Chlorine atom and a Chlorine ion. Bloody hell I got marked down because I only mentioned that they had the same number of protons and neutrons, but not HOW MANY BOTH HAD. Wtf lah everything's just going wrong for me these days.

One good thing: I might be getting a new phone because I've been checking up trademe.co.nz to see if I can get the phone I want at a good price. The cheapest I've found is $70 so if it stays at $70 I'm gonna use this month's pocket money to buy it muahahaha (:<

Okay what the hell I have nothing to post about. Will be catching Olympic Trials on tv later at 10pm. GO CAM AND GO CARST! (:

Tag replies!
Alisa: ZOMG You like flooded my tagboard?! And ISA is a guy's name? O_o Hmm but uh two guys having sex IS SO NOT RIGHT.

Jem: YES Step Up 2 is quite nice but I stilllll prefer Step Up! *Pouts*

Aliciatan: Ya lah I know lah Alisa polluted my tagboard like you polluted my mind HAHAHA ;) YES please keep my tagboard alive, please please please! And of course dear, you'll get a section of "Tag replies" dedicated to you everyday for one week straight (That's if you tag). LOL Mas selamat dumped you for me MUAHAHAHAHA. Hope to see your tag again tmr!

Justin: Argh dammit I forgot Chelsea's 2nd on the table now. Hahahah yeah man hopefully Man utd's gonna win the premier league again this season. When that happens I can laugh at my friend who's a hardcore arsenal fan ROFL. And yes I'm looking forward to the APSC gala night post!

Aliciafong: ARGHHH OMG HAHAHAHAHAHA TELL AMANDAKHOO (Because I can't tag on her tagboard. Which reminds me, TELL HER TO UNLOCK HER BLOG) THAT SHE WAS BLOODY CONVINCING AND THAT FOR ONE MOMENT I ACTUALLY THOUGHT THERE WAS SUCH A PERSON CALLED BRANDON LIM (Cause the name was pretty believable, too)!!! Oh ya don't forget to tell her that I'M GONNA HUNT HER DOWN WHEN I GO TO SINGAPORE! &Thanks so much, I won't know what to do if I didn't have friends like you back in S'pore (:

Da Chard: RICHARD! (: Lol I relinked you long before you tagged me to, fellow meatball. I relinked you when I first saw your new url on msn. I update my blog pretty often, don't be shocked hahaha (:

Bye world I hope tmr will be a better day.
0 Comments


Morning training was 4 sets of 20x33 drills again. Apparently Gary has a new craze now. It's the 4 sets of 20x33 drills, not the rainbow set anymore. Thank God! (: But the breaststroke drills are still effing difficult, and I'm like moving not because I'm doing them properly, but because I keep doing fly kicks :P

Watched Step Up 2: The Streets at 1.10pm in the afternoon. I think it was an okay movie. The dance moves were pretty cool and all, but the story plot wasn't all that good. Somehow I still prefer Step Up better :/ But I think Moose was pretty cool. I didn't expect him to be able to dance so well hahaha. Looks are deceiving.

Afternoon training was relatively quiet. Gary and Horst both weren't there because they were at Olympic trials. Only some of the Div II swimmers + those who didn't make for Olympic trials/Aust Age + those who didn't have events in Olympic trials today were present. So yeah there was only a small number of people. We swam 4 sets of 20x33 drills AGAIN (Omg 3rd time in 2 days!!). See what I mean about Gary's new craze? -.-

Something pissed me off big time before training. This was what had happened.

Well, because Gary and Horst were away at trials, Sam was supposed to take us for training. Uh, well Sam hadn't reached the pool yet, so the gate was closed and everyone was waiting outside for Sam to come and open the gate.

I was waiting beside Person 1 (for anonymous purposes), and then SOMEONE *coughcough*, previously mentioned in my earlier posts a few months ago as Person C, walked right past me and said Hi to Person 1, but not to me.

She freaking treated me like I didn't even exist, like I was invisible.

So what if you made it for Olympic trials! It's not that a big deal. It's just Olympic TRIALS. The fucking qualifying times weren't that hard to make. Okay even if they WERE hard, IT'S JUST THE TRIALS, DAMN IT.

It's not even like you made it to the Olympics or something. If you did, I'd probably be more tolerant towards your behavior, but this? NO EFFING WAY. I am not going to put up with your nonsense and I won't let you continue treating me like dirt.

During NAGs, you treated me like I was your slave. Wait, scratch that. You didn't treat me like I was your slave. You MADE me your slave. Always making me clean up after you made a mess in MY room..

Oh yeah, and then there was this whole I'm-in-a-worse-position-than-all-of-you-so-you-all-better-shut-up issue. Person 2 (for anonymous purposes, yet again) had been disappointed because she expected to come in 1st but came in 3rd in the end. Person 2 cried and then you were all, "If she thinks she swam badly, take a look at me! I didn't even win anything!" Like HELLO!? I was in front of you, and I didn't make it to any FINALS, let alone win any medals, and my swims were a lot worse than my personal PBs than you were from yours! Ugh!

Now you're good enough to make it to Olympic trials, eh?
So now I'm too lousy for you to acknowledge my existence huh?

When I first met you, I thought you were a nice girl, I really did. I bet you were only nice to me at first because my PBs were better than yours.

Then at NAGs when I didn't perform well, I disappeared into thin air, AM I RIGHT?
Ever since you did better than me in NAG, you're too good to waste your breath on me, RIGHT?
I'm not a good enough swimmer for you to be seen with, IS THAT IT?

Well, for your information, the timings you performed in NAG were not one bit close to my PBs at all. When the real Alyssa comes back, she's gonna give you a hard time.

By then, we'll see if you'll come running to me and talking to me like we've been best friends forever. When you do that, I'm not gonna give a shit about you, because I will remember what you've done to me when I was invisible.

You know what? Fuck you.

To hell with you, I'm leaving you alone. Just be warned that while you enjoy your "superstar moment", people are training hard to watch you fall right out of the sky.

&I'm one of them.

--
Is too angry to post anymore. Better luck tmr. Byebye.

--
Tag replies!
Mas Selamat: Ya I know. I know Osama inside out (:<

Claireteng: HAHA YEAH MAS SELAMAT ^^ And 8k drills is crazy, but at least we didn't finish it (: Ohman, I love short distance fly. Short distance meaning 50m ONLY :P

Coolest: Heheh, Mas Selamat IS a hilarious person by nature :D I KNOW I'm having tonnes of difficulty adapting to 33m. It's like I do a sprint, and then I don't know whether it's a good timing or not. HEH.

Amandakhoo: AMANDAKHOO tell me I got the correct amanda XD Because usually when you tag you don't use capital A for your name but I'm guessing it's you through the way you talk :P And YEAH COOL RIGHT 100 IM! That's why I wanna join! It sounds damn fun and it's definitely fun to swim too. Hahah cause NZ Springs is a short course competition so got 100 IM lorh.. Awesome eh!

Liying: HUH WHAT BRUSH WITH LOVE. I don't understand what you're talking about. Did aliciafong tell you something or whaaaat -.- Tell me leh I don't have a clue what you're talking about. And sure I'll check your blog (: Be sure there's an update when I check it!

Rachelyu: FINE FINE DDR THEN! Yknow I should challenge you to the hand one. The one at arcades. I'm pretty good at it, yknow (I just don't tell people cause it's not really something to be proud of, hahahahahah). I think the hand one is called parapara? :D Aaaah I really wanna go back to Singapore INSTANTLY ):
0 Comments


Okay today's training sessions were totally awesome!
(Cause they were slack, not because I had fun.)

In the morning we had 8k of drills. Yeah that was the entire set for morning session but of course we couldn't finish 8k of drills in 2 hours, so we cut it short to about 6k of drills + 6x33 HVOs.

I was super satisfied with my timings although I wasn't swimming freestyle. I hit 21secs for 33fly (And I was really shocked at this, because when Shannon told me I was doing 20s for 33fly, I didn't believe her one bit). I think I'll be taking 50 fly in NZ Springs because I'm UBER close to making the qualifying time. I'm just 0.19secs away from stupid QET ):<

And I maintained 23secs for 3x33 back, with and without dives (: Add them up and I get 1.09 for 100 back hahaha. The next time I swim 100 back, I'm gonna aim for below 1.15 :D

I'm mostly within 5% from the qualifying times for Springs so since I have up till September to train for it, I hope I'll make the qualifying times by then. Target events are: 50 + 100 + 200 + 400 free, 50 + 100 back, 50 fly and MAYBE 100IM.

Afternoon training was better than morning training. We had 4 sets of 20x33 drills, 1 set per stroke. It was quite tiring though, because the drills were damn hard to do properly -.- Especially the freaking breaststroke. Rah I hate breaststroke ):< Hahaha.

Uh that's all I'm gonna watch Step Up 2 tmr with my sis and her friends. Am looking forward to it. Nights everyone :D

Tag replies!
Roanne: LOL well at least you know each other! That's cool enough :P Hee!

Claireteng: ME TOO Aah we must must have more convos like that 8)

Coolest: I KNOW I LOVE THIS SKIN TOO! That's why I chose it ;D And yeah I miss writing letters but I remember last year I had so many letters to reply to, I nearly went crazy trying to reply them asap LMAO.

Mas Selamat: GASPS! D: How dare you invade my blog! I shall ask Osama to come and haunt you down HAHAHAHA (:

Toodles~
0 Comments


A very, very nice song by Faber Drive.

Sleepless Night
Another sleepless night
I'm still staring at the ceiling
I can hear him fighting
With her for no good reason
Will this ever end
Will this house be a home again
If I had my way
I'd corner him and say

Put yourself in her position
All she needs is recognition
Love's not enough when you say it
Don't you know you've gotta mean it
Screwing up the best thing ever
Is something you'll regret forever

Another day goes by
And nothing changed, he's still the same
I can hear her crying
Thinking she's the one to blame
Will this ever end (Will this ever end)
Will this house be a home again
If I had my way (If I had my way)
I'd corner him and say

Put yourself in her position
All she needs is recognition
Love's not enough when you say it
Don't you know you've gotta mean it
Screwing up the best thing ever
Is something you'll regret forever
Take her and make sure she feels it
Let her know you'll never let her go

Screwing up the best thing ever
Is something you'll regret forever
Another sleepless night
Nothing changed, he's still the same
Another stupid fight
And someone's gotta say

Put yourself in her position
All she needs is recognition
Love's not enough when you say it
Don't you know you've gotta mean it
Screwing up the best thing ever
Is something you'll regret forever
Take her and make sure she feels it
Let her know you'll never let her go

Put yourself in her position
All she needs is recognition
Take her and make sure she feels it
Let her know you'll never let her go
-Faber Drive

I love that song.

--
It's Easter Sunday today! That should mean out for shopping and hanging out and all, but all shops are closed today so I stayed at home all day. Woke up at like 10+am then I watched some of my old swimming videos from 2004 and 2005, and I saw how I swam a 29.85 and a 1.05.74 for 50 and 100 free in 2005. Damn, I can't believe I'm still stuck there! D:

But then, of course there were things that made me laugh. Amandakhoo, for instance. Our friendship runs a longggg way back hahah.

Uhm let's see. What else did I do.. Nothing much. Just basically watched dvds until American Idol was on at 6.40pm, then dinner and I've been stuck in front of the computer ever since! (:

No school tmr and Tuesday, whoopee! There's training though, damn! ): I can't believe Stef Rice broke the 400IM World record! That's just so amazing. Congrats to her and all the others who broke world records too :D

Tag replies!
Justin: Hahaha once I have the perfect masterplan, it'll be fun (:< Just thinking about it makes me laugh muahahahah!

Roanne: Hahah wow training with all these people must drive you to work alot harder, eh? Cool :D You can finally say, "My friend is a world record holder!" Haha :P

Amandakhoo: Yes we all love David Archuleta! <3 And sorry lah we only found out about A Walk to Remember recently! HEH. Hitler looks stupid with his moustache -.- And yeah I know the picture thing's damn cool right! (: UNLOCK YOUR BLOG PLEASE, BTW.

Aliciatan: HAPPY EASTER ACTOOB! <3 God loves you too and so does the creepy easter bunny yay :D

Claireteng: Yeah but still! NZ's not that far away from Aus ): Aw man choose here if you had to, please! Haha! And yeah I'm cool with the friend, acquaintance thing. I just wanted to post it to remind me about some.. uh, stuff.

Mariechong: I can't believe you passed Perth for your school funfair! D: And yeah school's one heck less stressful here, so I'm enjoying it (: Hahah sure is nice!

Brandon: Yo Brandon I see you finally tagged! Haha. Tag more often! Oh yeah, do you have Msn? Cause if you do, tag me your email then I can add you online.

Aliciafong: STOP IT IT WASN'T FUNNY OKAY HAHA :D

That's all for tonight. Later!
0 Comments


Friend
Noun

1. A person you know well and regard with affection and trust
2. An associate who provides cooperation or assistance
3. A person with whom you are acquainted
4. A person who backs a politician or a team etc
5. A member of the Religious Society of Friends founded by George Fox

Ac·quain·tance
Noun

1. Knowledge of a person acquired by a relationship less intimate than friendship
2. A relationship based on such knowledge
3. A person whom one knows
4. Knowledge or information about something or someone

I've gotten these two words all mixed up and realisation has hit me that I've been using the word 'friend' wrongly all this while.

We were never friends. We are merely acquaintances with each other because we all train in the same swim club.

I'm so glad I figured that out before I get more hurt.

--
Tag replies!
Mariechong: HAHA Why can't you believe that I gave up Raffles?! It's not that great a school anyway. I'm only sad cause I left behind all my friends. Other than that I don't really have any regrets cause Raffles food sucks and the homework load sucks more -.- Aww why didn't you go to asean cup at Vietnam or the perth meet?! I went last year zomg it was tonnes of fun!

Aliciatan: HEY GUESS WHAT! I don't get it either XD

WXy: WHO IN THE WORLD ARE YOU. OMG ARE YOU SOMEONE I'M SUPPOSED TO KNOW? D:

Nurul: I told you A Walk to Remember is nice! :D Hahahahah! Yeah I cried loads too :P I KNOW I can't believe I have the same birthday as Hitler! D:

Amandayim: ROFL damn it I wished wikipedia didn't have all the answers ):<

Justin: Muahahahah if it's a surprise then you're not supposed to KNOW about it, right? (:<

Peishan: YESSS David Archuleta! <3
0 Comments


Easter hols are finally here! (: No school from today until next Tuesday, so that's a 3-day week in school next week! Yipee :D

Yesterday I trained at HPK in the morning. Uhm, it was not rainbow set, thank goodness! It was basically just drills and etc so it wasn't that bad. Yeah.

Left for school and I got my chem results back. I was really excited cause I was confident of getting an Excellence. Well, I did. At first ):< Mr Hassan just had to change my marks from Excellence to a Merit because I didn't right Cl- while explaining! GYAH BUT I WROTE CHLORINE IS NEGATIVELY CHARGED, DAMN IT. So on the top right hand corner of my paper, there was an 'E' that had been x-ed, and then beside it there's a huge 'M' that was circled. I don't care I will BEG Mr Hassan to give me an Excellence LOL.

I took bus home with my sis again. Man, I miss being able to tap my ez link card in Singapore. The bus system here is lousy compared to Singapore ): Then my sis left for training at her squash club while I waited till it was 5.15pm before I left for training at Laser Mt Eden.

Over there, I got introduced to the girl swimmers (there were only 2 girls) and the team is SUPER small in number compared to HPK. I think even Horst's group of swimmers 16 and above at HPK is bigger than the whole of Laser Mt Eden. The training was pretty slack, I'm guessing it's because majority of them are going for Olympic trials next week. Swam 3.1km and the whole thing was just 25m sprints and all. Yep.

Went home, ate and then spent the night talking to Rachel Aliciatan Peiqi Huazhen Claireteng <3 but then I couldn't really talk to some of them because my computer kept jamming. Ugh it annoys me to the max. CLAIRETENG I WANT THE PHOTOSSSS PLEASE COME ONLINE SO THAT THE SHARING FOLDERS WILL WORK! :P Hahahah I miss all of them soooooo much ): ): ):

Uh right, that was yesterday. This is today's update.

Training this morning. HAH It wasn't rainbow set again! :D It was recovery so we swam 1km choice equipment + 5x800 swim, kick, pull, drill, swim + 1km choice equipment and I think that's it? Hahah yeah.

NO SCHOOL so I went home and slacked a lot. I finished some work for History: 4 out of 10 biographies. Which is not bad because I only spent 1hr doing work. The rest of the time between morning training and afternoon training, I spent it on watching tv because Disney was showing back to back episodes of Hannah Montana from 6am till 12midnight ROFL. It's still showing now but I thought I'd take out some time to update my blog since I've already watched that episode heh.

Afternoon training! NO RAINBOW SET AGAIN (: I sure hope Gary's over his rainbow set craze, if not we'll probably get it tmr morning ):< It was sorta like recovery again (: I got one whole lane to myself, because David didn't turn up for training (and he won't turn up tmr morning again, so I hope I get one lane to myself again!) Andrei wanted to swim in my lane but upon realising that the lane beside me was empty too, he took it so we both got our own lanes.

We were like the only 2 who took training more seriously, because both of us didn't make it to NZ Open or olympic trials, so unlike the others who did, we had to do what the programme said. If it was 8x100 kick, it was kick. Those who were going for Open/ Olympic trials could do own choice equipment, so they all wore fins ):<

Wasn't that tiring, but I trained well (: Yup so now I'm home and I'll do some more biographies before I catch Drake & Josh on nickelodeon at 8pm. Then AMERICAN IDOL! DAVID ARCHULETA FTW <3 I think he's cute (:

Oh, and guess what I found out today. Adolf Hitler has the same birthday as me. Wow.

That's it for today, check tmr for more! Tag replies will be up tmr, too (:
0 Comments


Right now I'm pushing aside whatever happened during the day, mostly because all my beloved friends are online and I can't risk my com jamming again (like it already has, 5 times in the past 10 minutes) so I'll just put up tag replies!

Tag replies!
Huazhen & Liying: Hey guys, no problem! But I still feel so guilty that you guys received your cards late cause I wrote the stupid wrong address ): I promise there won't be a next time and that you will all get your cards on time :D And Huazhen, SHAME ON YOU I expected you to get the joke HAHAHAHAH just kidding! I still love you all! <3

Aliciatan: YOWZA I think it takes 3 days more or less? I don't know :P Why you wanna write me a letter ah. GEEZ I'M SO TOUCHED )': Hahahahah I LOVE YOU TOO in a TOTALLY LES way (:< HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Rachelyu: Omg I just realised we don't have a neoprint together either! NOOOOOO when I go back we must do movies neoprints and etc okay! And I demand a rematch at your house for para para!! LOVE YOU HONEYBUNCH. HAHAHA <3 I really can't wait to go back to Singapore! >.<

Okay that's all I'm back to catching up with all mah girls (lol wth why am I talking like this). Hmm. Enjoy the long weekend! (:
0 Comments


No morning training on Wednesdays as usual, had late start for school at 9.20am this morning then I took bus home with my sis after school cause my dad couldn't fetch me to training at HPK. Was supposed to train at Laser Mt Eden but I convinced my dad to give me a session off today. Will be training there tmr afternoon though :/

Basically just one major update today. I got back my Investigations (aka Human Bio) paper today and we sorta went through the answers. Honestly, I was kinda disappointed about only getting a Merit for my Inv paper, cause I felt like I put in a lot of effort to learn everything right from the beginning in 2 weeks while everyone else had 8 weeks. This was cause I only transferred up to Year 11 in week 6 and then I went to Christchurch for a week so I was like dunno-how-many weeks behind. Plus I thought I did a neat job in answering the questions on the paper..

Well, yknow how people always say "Trust a woman's instinct"? I finally nailed it this time.

I found out that my teacher had miscalculated my marks and that I actually got an Excellence for my paper. Oh yeah baby (:

Out of 3 tests, I got 2 Excellences. Just gotta wait for my Chem results before I see how well I'm coping in school.

I love it when I don't feel inferior (:

Tag replies!
Sarahdahlberg: Muahahaha (:< Tagged ya at your blog already!

Claireteng: NOOOOO Why choose Aust! Come migrate to NZ too and we can go to school together again! Why does everyone choose Aust over NZ ):

Caro: Hahah not quite, but yeah quite a few new friends ;D Haven't got to know them very well yet though.

Mariechong: HAHA No way lah I won't move overseas just to study at 14 years old.. Actually my family never planned on moving anywhere. I was planning to go overseas to study for Uni after JC in Singapore but my dad applied for a job here, and he got it so we all decided that it was better if we moved. Yeah that's all there is to it ROFL.

Rachelyu: COOL! I've never seen them in their costumes before so I don't really know what they look like.. And you ALREADY have a lot of friends, rachel. Don't be so greedy HAHAH :D
0 Comments


Morning training was same old rainbow set. I was feeling pretty good in the water, though it wasn't as good as Monday morning :/ I sprinted so hard for my 100m max and Gary was pushing me bloody hard for it, like it was a competition race. He'd signal for me to push myself harder whenever I breathed. Ugh I hate that kinda pressure. 20x15 after one set of rainbow set, and after approximately 10 I got out of the water to get to school.

School as usual. Not sure if that's a good thing or not O_o Uhm swimming PE first thing in the morning after assembly. Geography after that. We have an effing geog exam question to attempt as homework and it's an effing ESSAY question ):< Phroarrrr. After recess I had history and watched some video on Adolf Hitler. God, I have so much work for History! It never seems to end. I ate Shapes during lunch (: It's damn nice lah! Did some experiments that I've done before in Singapore during Chemistry.. Then I learnt about probability during Math to end the day.

Afternoon training was so much better than the previous 3 sessions of the week. WE DIDN'T HAVE RAINBOW SET! ;D Hahahahahah. There were like 2 programmes so we were hoping we got the sprint set, cause it was LOADS easier. In the end, we were right. Those who were going for Open/Aust Age had to do the harder programme. Whee.

I did something damn embarrassing during training in the afternoon lah! After 4x33, we were supposed to do 2x20 dive but I forgot about it and I thought we were doing the 1x33 dive.. So I swam all the way to 33, and then when I finished I realised no one was there! I turned around then everyone was at the 20m mark. I was like, OH SHIT and then Andrei shouted damn loudly at me, "Oi!" and he started waving his arms at me. Omg I felt so embarrassed. Somemore Val laughed damn loudly at me! HAHAHAHAHA OMG I FELT SO STUPID LAH! XD

ZZZ I think I will go downstairs to spend my time watching tv till 10pm, afterwhich I shall do some History work until 11pm or so before bedtime.
Late start @ 9.20am tmr! PLUS, no morning training tmr, and I'll be training at Laser Mt Eden tmr cause my dad can't fetch me to HPK to train ):

Tag replies!
Amandayim: Muahahahaha I'm gonna be mean and leave it to you to find out for yourself when my birthday is ;D And I don't know, Cbox is damn stupid lah, go and censor 'shit' -.-

Amandakhoo: HAHA Yeah it was 12am when you tagged, and YES 55MIN LUNCH ROCKS! :D

Siyan: OMG COOL! If you move, get a house near to mine and we can go to school together AAAH! (:

Rachelyu: STILL! Sigh, rachel, SIGH! Take better care of your belongings k! Haiyohh. And LOL cool what are you learning about them! I have maori friends :D And please, come and drag my butt back there cause I really prefer to be there too )':

Nurul: Omg patrick star! <3 We should all dress up as patrick star on st patrick's day 8)
0 Comments


YES YES YES YES !! :D

I had the most awesome training this morning. We started out with 4x(6x66) for warm-up and then we had some shit rainbow set (that's what Gary names it -.-) and it was fucking tiring I tell you! But I swam like the best ever since I came to NZ. I felt great and I did really good times too. Gary was pleased and he told me to keep up the good work

Here is the rainbow set we did this morning.
HR= Heart rate, SR= Stroke rate

4x100 on 1.30, HR 140 + SR 31
3x66 on 1.00, HR 150 + SR 32
200 on 3.00, HR 160 + SR 33

2x100 on 1.50, HR 170 + SR 43-47
3x66 on 1.35, HR 180-190 + SR 43-47
100 on 2.30, MAX
3x33 on .40, MAX
200 on 3.00, EZ
[Twice through]

Omg I freaking died after one set, and I was on the 2nd lap of the 2nd set when Gary suddenly shouted at me. It was really scary, cause I was breathing to the opposite side of where he was standing. Imagine swimming and all of a sudden, you hear someone shout, "Alyssa!" damn loud at you. I got a shock and I stopped immediately.

Then I found out that he moved me and some others (namely Shannon, Kate and Brianna) into lane 1 and we were asked to do 20x15 dive sprints instead of the 2nd set of rainbow set. I was half relieved half disappointed. I was really determined to push myself to do my very best for the 2nd half of the rainbow set.. Ahwell.

Did like less than 10 dives then I had to hop out of the water cause I had to go to school at 7.20am.

--
School was pretty relaxed today. It was mufti day! Meaning we could wear whatever we wanted to (: Cause today's St Patrick's Day :D I wore green shorts and green shoes to match the green theme of St Pat's. LOL.

Many people were out of class today, because they were all on bio trip. So for english, we just stayed at the library to read (which I really really enjoy).

History was kinda messy; I was still wayyyy behind

For math we started a new topic: Probability. I heard from my ex tuition teacher in S'pore that it was a useless topic.. My sis claims the same thing too. Lol. We spent practically the whole lesson just rolling dices to see the probability of getting a 6 -.- In total we all rolled our dices 160 times. Yep. Oh, and I got my math test back. I got Excellence (which apparently is the highest grade anyone can get) and I missed perfect score by one question! Urgh! Me still no happy bout that.

Lunch time I spent the whole hour at the library rewriting my history notes neatly and getting things sorted out. Omg it really helps to have a 55min long lunch. You can do soooooooo much work.

Geography! Mrs Outram was away on a field trip with some students so we had a relief teacher who was only in charge of making us copy down some notes.. That was pretty much it I guess (:

Human Bio/ Investigations. We convinced Mr Hassan not to teach us anything today cause of the absences of some students due to Bio trip. He let us do our own work and I finished re-organising my History stuff. Yay! But on the not-so-bright side, I only got a Merit for my Bio test

--
Afternoon training. I got a shock when I saw Gary - He was wearing a huge green hat, a green shirt and he had a fake green beard on -.- Then when I walked past his bagpack, I saw a hairband with two tiny green balloon thingies attached to it that says: Kiss me, I'm Irish. Well, Gary is Irish, you see.. So I suppose he takes St Patrick's Day pretty seriously eh. HAHA.

Anyway we had almost the exact same set as this morning. Just that 24x66 replaced 4x(6x66). Eh wait that's the same -.- We had rainbow set after it again but it was semi-modified.

2x200 on 3.00, HR 140 + SR 31
2x100 on 1.30, HR 150 + SR 32
200 on 3.00, HR 160 + SR 33

2x100 on 1.50, HR 170 + SR 43-47
3x66 on 1.35, HR 180-190 + SR 43-47
100 on 2.30, MAX
3x33 on .40, MAX
200 on 3.00, EZ
[Twice through]

This time Gary made us do Form stroke for the max part for the first set ):< Which mean I had to do backstroke. It was okay-ish but I would've been more satisfied doing free.

The same thing happened and I called called out of the rainbow set to do 20x15 dive sprints with Kate Shannon David Amanda Alex Stefan Tessa Val. We kinda went crazy and all, false-starting each other because Gary left us to start each other. He had to take care of the other swimmers swimming the rainbow set.

We'll be having the rainbow set for the next 2 weeks.. Or at least that's what Gary claims. I am so not looking forward to it >.<

Hokay I'll get back to my History notes for now cause I wanna keep my Easter hols free. That's from Friday to Tuesday MUAHAHAHA

Oh damn I have swimming PE first block tmr. ZZZ.

One last thing,
HAPPY ST PATRICK'S DAY!



Tag replies!
Roanne: Hey Ro, great to know you're settling in well in training and school! I'm having a bit of trouble with that as you already know :/ I guess I'll just be myself and if they don't accept it, it's not my fault. I'll hang in there (: I'll try, anyway ;D Thanks so much!

Claireteng: HAHAH I know it's kinda mad huh. But it just shows that Siyan's family is really bonded which is great (: I wish my family could be like that, too.

Zhekang: AAH I LOVE THAT SONG TOO. It's my fave song from Daughtry so far (: It used to be Over You but then I got sick of it heh. Kinda miss you pretty much too! Update your blog often cause I've been reading it!

Xinping: AWW I LOVE YOU TOO! I'm so touched )': Thankyou for believing in me!

Rachelyu: RACHEL! <333 Hahah hearting is cool ;D MY BIRTHDAY ISN'T UNTIL A MONTH LATER ROFL. That's not called soon! AND ZOMG YOU AND ALICIATAN ARE HOPELESS! Sigh! Be more responsible or your parents aren't gonna trust you in anything soon! I haven't lost a single thing while I'm overseas. Pro huh! Hahah be more careful next time k! LOVE

Coolest: Bake up any frownies IS cute, right!! YAY :D I miss writing letters to you during class! ):

Okay I'm outta here (:
0 Comments


It's sad how people you know become people you knew. When you can walk past someone like they were never a big part of your life. How you used to be able to talk for hours and how now, you can barely even look at them.

It's sad how times can change.

--

Missing someone isn't about how long it's been since you've seen them last or the amount of time since you've talked. It's about that very moment when you're doing something and you wish that they were right there with you.
0 Comments


You, you got me
Thinking it'll be alright
You, you told me
"Come and take a look inside"
You believed me
In every single lie
But I, I failed you this time

And it feels like tonight
I can't believe I'm broken inside
Can't you see that there's nothing that I wanna do
But try to make it up to you
And it feels like tonight
Tonight

I was waiting
For the day you'd come around
I was chasing
And nothing was all I found
From the moment you came into my life
You showed me what's right

And it feels like tonight
I can't believe I'm broken inside
Can't you see that there's nothing that I wanna do
But try to make it up to you
And it feels like tonight

I never felt like this before
Just when I leave, I'm back for more
Nothing else here seems to matter
In these ever-changing days
You're the one thing that remains
I could stay like this forever

And it feels like tonight
I can't believe I'm broken inside
Can't you see that there's nothing that I wanna do
But try to make it up to you
And it feels like tonight
Tonight
(Feels like tonight)
Tonight
(Feels like tonight)

Cause there's nothing that I wanna do
But try to make it up to you
And it feels like tonight
Tonight
-Daughtry

I've failed so many people who believed me when I said I'd train hard and do them proud. I want to make it up to them, I really do. All I'm asking is for you to believe me in one more lie..

Tag replies!
Aaronlim: Oh you didn't get to see him? How sad ): Nah definitely not going SEA Age.. I don't think I'll ever go for one :/ But you did well for your 1500 free, no? Stupid 1st heat of 1st event of 1st day.. I always screw it up. And no, they won't see my blog. I hardly talk to them so I'll never have to reveal my blog to them (:< Of course lah I wish I had the COE team to warm up with, sit with and talk and laugh with )':

Amandakhoo: OMFG You're kidding!! How come the math SA is so much easier than the math FA!? Absurd! HAHA 4.0 is below average.. RGS and it's crazily smart people. GEEZ! D: And Liying IS sweet whaaat ;D Heh.

Amandayim: ROFL We all make stupid mistakes sometimes. In my case, all the time. That stupid stupid stupid mistake I made last year in my math SA3. It cost me one mark from full marks RAHH. Secret admirers are weird sometimes >.< And yep I uploaded loads of pictures.. And believe me, my courage and determination isn't taking me anywhere. Probably because I don't have any to start with :/

Siyan: OMG Hey I'm okay-ish here. Though life isn't as good as it is in Singapore, I guess I'll live (: AAH you mean you could be migrating here as well!? AAAH!!!! :D

Mariechong: Hahah yeah only on good days, like those. Sometimes I don't talk throughout the whole of training. It really doesn't depend on me. It depends on the mood of the other swimmers. If they feel Christian then they'll talk to me. If not I'm invisible, yknow? :/

Coolest: No worries I appreciate it! (: I read every of your xanga updates, in case you didn't know (: I just don't visit your blog cause I get Xanga subscriptions which show me your updates so I don't have to :D

Claireteng: HAHA I'm not surprised people like Rainer get into newspaper. They're so freakishly fast!! LOL. I think Siyan meant that the whole family might be migrating?! O_O I don't know I'll ask her :P And HAHA I was like, "Huh what quiz is she talking about?!" when I read your tag.. Then you tagged that you read the 2006 post and I was like, "Oh.. LOL." Love! <3

Aliciatan: SHUT UPPPP ITS NOT FUNNY OKAY!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Justin: Thanks so much for your encouragement (: It feels nice to know people care about me (: And bake up any frownies is such a cute phrase! Thanks again! ;D

Peishan: Hahah yeah I know it's just the beginning, but I couldn't help but be disappointed :/ Don't worry I'm kinda all cheered up already (: Thanks!
0 Comments


The post some of you have been waiting for.

Day 1 - 2 March 2008, Sunday
I kinda freaked out cause I reached the airport like, super early. Then I didn't know where to go, so I just stood at a spot looking like an idiot -.- Guess who I saw just then. ANDREI. He was lurking around the corner. I went, "Omg omg omg" and I stayed out of his sight until more people came (: Heh. We all just stayed around at the airport for about 2 hours. Then we finally boarded the plane.

I supposedly got the aisle seat, with Jules at the window and Caylee in between us. Not exactly my ideal seating partners, but since I figured I wouldn't have talked anyway, it'll be okay. Jules swopped seats with me. I know she was kinda making use of me but heck, I just agreed. I was fine with that arrangement until I found out that ____ was sitting in front of my initial seat! I was how sad lah ): I kept quiet the whole way and I just listened to my ipod. I felt so alone. The trip wasn't starting out great.

After landing, we immediately went to the pool to train. The pool was quite nice. Especially the public side. There were slides + lazy river + all the fun things that public pools have.. Well basically we trained quite a bit before leaving for the apartment.








^The pool

We made our way to the apartment after training and after moving into our rooms, I realised that my luggage got smashed when it was in the van. The cracks were really bad so I had to ask Jeff to help me buy some tape. I shared a room with 2 single beds with Tessa and Kate got the room with a double bed to herself. Our apartment had like, 2 toilets + 2 bedrooms + a kitchen + a dining table + a living room. It was pretty nice (: We had a tv in each bedroom, too.


^Cracked luggage


^My bed is the one on the right, Tessa's is the one on the left


^Overall view of the apartment room


^Kitchen


^Dining table


^Living room

Unpacked then out for dinner. We all walked to a restaurant and had dinner. Food was quite nice (to me, anyway). Team meeting at 8.30pm after dinner then watched a bit of tv then bedtime.

Day 2 - 3 March 2008, Monday
I woke up at like 7.30am in the morning cause I decided to go for morning training, unlike some others. (We could choose whether to train or not.) Only 7 from the team didn't go. The rest did. Swam a bit then back to hotel to shower and change. We were running late and we (Kate, Tessa and I) nearly got left behind by the van(s). Luckily we ran downstairs in time. Made our way to the cinema. I bought a cup of hot chocolate and one large cookie :D Haha. Watched The Bucket List. It was some movie about 2 very different people suffering from cancer who stayed in the same ward and became really good friends before they both died. The story was quite sad and touching, but I wouldn't have chosen it if it wasn't the only movie that suited our timing :/ Hmm.

Training again after movie + lunch. Back to apartment for shower then dinner at same place, just that this time everyone left dinner early to watch Shortland Street on tv. Lol. I watched a bit of it too. Got my nametag and club flag and programme booklet from Jeff. Team meeting as usual then I had a short talk about my event's pre-race + strategies etc with Gary before bed.

Day 3 - 4 March 2008, Tuesday
Day 1 of competition.

Up at 5.50am to get things ready for comp. Did my warm-up, got changed and soon I reported to the marshalling area. I was in the 1st heat of the 1st event of the 1st day. Usually, whenever that happens to me, I screw up big time.

Well, I did.

Swam a pathetic 5.02min for 400 free. I couldn't stop crying after that. I wanted so much to use this time's NAG to prove to everyone in my club that I deserved to belong to that club. I wanted them to know that I could be as good as anyone of them were. I wanted to swim well, and show them that I was one of them. I wanted so badly for them to accept me. I tried really hard, but it wasn't enough. It never is.

For the rest of the heats, I just stoned and I couldn't even smile. Not even when people tried to comfort me. Not even when Horst tried to make me laugh by doing stupid dances in front of me. Nothing worked. My tears seemed endless. Needless to say, I didn't make it to the finals so I didn't have any event in the evening session. Sigh :/

Imagine what they think of me now. "What a loser she is, she can't even qualify for a final when her PB is faster than mine."

Lunch back at apartment after shower. I took a nap till 5pm then left for the pool to watch finals. I was out of the 4 people who didn't make it to the finals. HPK was 3rd in placing after today's races. I was really comforted when Carsten tried to cheer me up -- at least someone cared.

I sat alone throughout the whole thing. Actually, I sat alone for every heat and every final. With my ipod, of course. But even my ipod didn't want me sometimes. It always left my hands to be in someone else's. I couldn't say no to people who wanted to borrow my ipod. I didn't know how to. Afterall, I really wanted them to accept me. Maybe if I were nicer to them, they'd be nicer to me too.

I don't think lending my ipod helped. I should've just said no right from the start.

Had snacks when we got back from finals at 9pm. Sushi, chicken drumstick and a wrap. Something to cheer my stomach up, at least.

100 free the next day. Went to bed before anything could get any worse.

Day 4 - 5 March 2008, Wednesday
Day 2 of competition.

100 free : 1.05.84
Again the tears pour.
& It's times like these that I want someone to lean on.

I don't remember much of what happened that day, because the above was all I wrote in my book. Must've been a bad day. Actually the whole week was bad. Ohwell doesn't make a difference then.

Day 5 - 6 March 2008, Thursday
Day 3 of competition.

I convinced myself not to cry anymore even though I knew I was going to have horrible races for the rest of the competition. What's the point of crying again and again and again when you know it's not going to get any better, right?

200m free today. I teared a little when I was at a loss of what to do after warm-up. I felt so not up to 200 free )': Gary gave me a short talk. After that, I thought, "What the hell, I'm gonna end up doing a 2.30."

I swam beside Liz, and honestly, it was nerve-wrecking. Afterall I wanted to badly to try to fit in with the team, yknow? In the end I swam 2.25. Liz did a 2.23. Wasn't that bad a swim, I guess. But after my race, I felt like I could've done better, which sent me on a guilt trip ):< No tears though; I'm so grateful for that.

I was quite cheerful for the rest of the day, so I cheered for people at finals for a change. I was happy when swimmers from HPK did well (: Although I know none of them gave a shit about me, I still cheered for them as if they were my best friends.


^Corey in the middle with his gold!


^Lance carrying Harris for some weird reason


^Ewan and Alex with theire medals (They're the ones in black shirts)


^Cameron, with drawings on his back that has a picture of a banana and says: DNT TOUCH WAT YOU CNT AFFORD

Actually, when I don't think about how I did in my races, I started enjoying this trip a little. I felt mistreated and made use of by certain people though. Like how I always had to clean up their plates + leftover food after they had lunch/dinner at my room. Maybe if I didn't get along with them, it would be their loss, not mine. Hmm :/

Today Lance went crazier than usual and put a banana skin on the Northshore swim team van. Someone had already put a banana skin on the windscreen but Lance just had to add one more -.- Some people are just plain retarded. Lol.

Back in apartment after finals and watched Stranger Than Fiction. Lights out after that.

Day 6 - 7 March 2008, Friday
Day 4 of competition.

Those who didn't have events + those who had events only in the later part of the morning went to the beach instead of sticking around at the pool to wait for time to pass. Damn, the beach was bloody beautiful. We "did our warm-up" at the beach and just played around until 8.30am. Then we went back to the pool.


^Sunrise (:




^The playground by the beach


^My favourtie pic. That's Kate in the picture.


^Bouquet of flowers by the sea


^Memorial plates along the bridge thingy


^View from where I stood


^Surfer dudes out at 8am in the morning


^The rest of the team by the beach


^Another beautiful pic of sunrise (:


^Some fishing guide thingy








^Scenery (:


^A funny pic of Cameron doing his side steps :D


^David and Corey


^Stefan and some others at the back


^HPK team (not completed)

I warmed up at about 9.30am for 50 Back, then changed and rested for my event. There was 100 Back for the guys before my event. Some heats had already been swam, and I was like wondering, "When the hell was I supposed to report?" Cause usually Tracy/Jeff will call you out when it's your time to report.

Suddenly, Tracy went, "OMG, Alyssa, you have to run to the other end of the pool. NOW. You're late for your event." I was like !()*&^*%$ WTF and I sprinted all the way to the other end of the pool, only to find people from my heat already standing at the blocks, ready to get into the water. Thank God I made it in time!

In the end I did a PB of 35.6 (the only PB I ever did in NAG 08). It isn't that good a time, if you compared it with other people but heck, I'm still glad.

When I came back, I found out from Tracy that I was late for my event because Jeff had forgotten to highlight my name. Hahah then I had an idea to trick Jeff (Cause he had sent some swimmers back to the apartment while I was swimming, and had no idea he nearly caused me to miss my event). I suggested to Tracy that we could all put on an act and tell Jeff that I had missed my event and it was because he didn't highlight my name! ROFL.

So Gary played along too, and he sent Jeff a text message, saying "Alyssa missed her event. Name not highlighted." HAHAHA Tracy, Gary and I all cracked up thinking about how Jeff would react when we got back to the apartment. We had it all planned out. I had to act sad and all, and Tracy would cover up for me. Heh.

When I went into Jeff's room to get my lunch, Cameron and Carsten and Jeff were all sitting on the couch watching tv. This was what had happened.

Jeff:
So, did you get a PB?

Me:
(Confused. I didn't know he knew that we were tricking him.)
(Remains speechless.)

Carsten:
(Looks at me and says)
He's talking to you.

Me:
I know.

- Awkward pause -

Me:
Jeff, what did Tracy tell you?

Jeff:
How was your swim?

Me:
Jeff, did Tracy tell you anything?

Jeff:
No.

Me:
(Even more confused. What the hell was going on!? Did he know or did he not know!)

Jeff:
Gary spilled the beans.

Me:
OH, DAMN!!!!!!

Jeff:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You know when I received his text, I felt so sick and guilty!?!

Me:
HAHA serves you right! Who asked you to forget my name!?

Then I took my lunch, said, "Thanks Jeff" and then I left the room. Hahahah stupid Gary ):<

I think that was the main highlight of the day, cause I didn't exactly write anything else in my book. Except for the fact that David and I were both high during finals that day. We kept laughing and talking about stupid stuff. He was the only one who talked to me for more than 10 sentences per day. He's my really good friend now (: Yay.


^David with the huge HPK hat covering his head. He asked me to take this picture of him ROFL.


^Everyone say hi to Caylee


^That's Harris


^Don't ask me what Liz was doing back then


^Smiley Shannon


^Andrei looking confused (?)

Day 7 - 8 March 2008, Saturday
Day 5 of competition.

I had 50 free. I swam 30.65. Terrible swim. I couldn't move at all. I fought back the tears so I didn't cry in front of everyone.. Which was good. My heart was bleeding so badly inside though. It felt horrible to keep it inside. "Oh well, what the heck, so I had another bad swim, that's all" that's what I thought.

Then later at night during finals session, Anonymous (Don't wanna mention names) swam her 50 free finals and she did 27.85. I watched her swim. She practically breathed every 2 strokes. AND, she wasn't a freestyler. She was a breaststroker.

Apparently her timing won her a GOLD for 50 free. I immediately had to run out of the pool (it was indoors) to cry. It was just SO UNFAIR! She didn't train freestyle, and whenever she did, I ALWAYS won her! Shouldn't I deserve the 27.85 more than she did!? SHE ALSO BREATHED EVERY 2 STROKES while I only took 4 breaths throughout my whole 50 free!

WHAT THE FUCK I DON'T SEE WHY I DESERVED ANY LESS THAN SHE DID! I mean, I've worked so much harder than her! I train full 10 sessions a week; she trains only 8. I never go to the toilet to skip a part of training; she always does that. AND THIS IS HOW I'M REPAID?! IT'S JUST NOT FAIR! I spent the rest of that finals session running outside to cry whenever I thought too much about it. I was so so so so so upset.

Back at the apartment after finals, I had to tape up my luggage because it literally fell apart. My luck had been really bad, hadn't it. Dinner at Lone Star and most of us had ribs! Omg it was damn nice! (: Didn't really talk much (except to David) so we were back at the apartment by 12.30am. Bed after that cause we had the morning flight the next day.


^What we usually do while waiting by the pool


^Jeff, Jay (sp?), Horst, Gary and Tracy! :D


^Team photo
From left to right:
1st row (bottom): Michelle, Rachel, Renee, Jules, Corey
2nd row : Tracy, Alex, Emma, Caylee, David, Andrei, Stefan, Horst, Gary
3rd row : Jeff, Liz, Shannon, Kate, Tessa, Me, Carsten, Lance and Jay (below Lance)
4th row (top): Herman, Ewan, Cameron, Swimming NZ sign, Harris

Day 8 - 9 March 2008, Sunday
I ended up sitting with Tessa & Liz on the plane back. Again, no one talked to me. At all. It was a silent ride. Liz wanted to borrow my ipod (again) and I said okay (again..) She asked if it was really alright if she borrowed it. I said yes. Then I think she suddenly realised that if she borrowed my ipod, I would have nothing and nobody. So she felt really bad and she changed her mind. I thank her for that. My ipod was all I listened to the whole way.

When we landed, everyone met their parents immediately but my parents were nowhere to be found. I got my luggage and it got cracked even more so I walked around aimlessly with a terribly cracked luggage trying to look for my parents.

My nz phone had ran out of $$ so I couldn't call them. Thank God David was still there and he offered to lend me his phone to call my dad. I had to walk outside to look for them. I was really upset at how horrible my week had been, so I angrily slammed the door(s) of my car in front of my dad and my club manager (Jeff). I started crying like hell the moment I stepped into the car.

My dad then scolded me like hell about my behavior at NAG and my behavior in front of Jeff. He said he was really embarrassed blah blah blah and then he scolded me about me not working hard enough and that I deserved what I got during NAG. I kept crying until after I got home. I swear, I will do better at the next competition, whatever it is. I swear I'm gonna prove to everyone in my club (especially all the girls who look down on me) and my parents that I know what I'm doing in my life. I swear I'll make it one day.

--
That's the whole story of NAG 08. The next time I travel with the team, I'm gonna make sure I'm actually part of it, and that I'm not just something invisible that no one can see.

First step is to try training harder. Will I fail before my foot lands on the ground? We'll see about that.
0 Comments