The first night that we met
I will never forget
Baby, you were a star
Oh, from that point in time
It was always you and I
Shining so beautiful

Later out with your friends
You treat me like I’m dead
It was like I’m invisible

(I can’t let it go)
That was unforgivable
(I can’t let it go)
I just wanna let you know
(I can’t let it go)
Situations unliveable
(I can’t let it go)
I can’t let it go
(I can’t let it go)

So tell me why you say that you want me
When all you ever do, girl
Is push on my buttons
You always bring me down
In public
When nobody’s around
You say that you love me
Make me say oh no
I see you all alone
I’m half way out the door
Unless you turn around
And treat me right

Oh, you got me twisted
Oh, you got me twisted
I’m not someone you can just disrespect, oh
How would you feel if you were in my shoes?
Feeling used, with a heart bruised

(I can’t let it go)
The situations critical
(I can’t let it go)
Relationship is pitiful
(I can’t let it go)
Everything’s falling apart
(I can’t let it go)
Cause you’re so hypocritical

So tell me why you say that you want me
When all you ever do, girl
Is push on my buttons
You always bring me down
In public
When nobody’s around
You say that you love me
Make me say oh no
I see you all alone
I’m half way out the door
Unless you turn around
And treat me right

Y-y-you just no good for me
you’re no good for me
you’re just no good for me
I know you’re no good for me

You know
It’s wrong to treat me cold
No one to hold
One day I’m gonna say goodbye
What’s it gonna be
Girl, I’m gonna leave
Unless you turn around
And treat me right

So tell me why you say that you want me
When all you ever do, girl
Is push on my buttons
You always bring me down
In public
When nobody’s around
You say that you love me
Make me say oh no
I see you all alone
I’m half way out the door
Unless you turn around
And treat me right

I see you all alone
I’m half way out the door
Unless you turn around
And treat me right

Just treat me right
Just treat me right
Say that you want me
Just treat me right
Just treat me right

So tell me why you say that you want me
When all you ever do, girl
Is push on my buttons
You always bring me down
In public
When nobody’s around
You say that you love me
Make me say oh no
I see you all alone
I’m half way out the door
Unless you turn around
And treat me right

I see you all alone
I’m half way out the door
Unless you turn around
And treat me right
-Backstreet Boys

My tragic love story.
And yes, that is what you're doing to me.



Baking cookies cheer me up though (:

Dreading training later. This morning's training was horrible enough.
Looking forward to tmr.
Last session + Breakfast! ;D

Sayonara~
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Breakfast this morning was fun.
Thanks sele eve scott richard peishan for making my day :D

Training later better be goooooood (:

--

5th January 2008, 9pm.
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Hey, tell me what's going on
Hey, tell me where I go wrong
I've been losing all I got
Then you, you just walk right in
You just walk right in

When I'm here with you
I just block it out
It's cool we talk about whatever
And yeah, you know I've been around
My world came crashing down
But when I'm here with you
I'm better

Hey, I'm watching the worlds collide
Hey, there's nobody else inside
Girls they don't know what they want
But you, you just walk right in
You just walk right in

When I'm here with you
I just block it out
It's cool we talk about whatever
And yeah, you know I've been around
My world came crashing down
But when I'm here with you
I'm better

Used to be that I just had to fake it
All my life
Over and over I just couldn't take it
Not this time
But you, wherever you walk
I'll run
Yeah you, anything goes tonight

When I'm here with you
I just block it out
It's cool we talk about whatever
And yeah, you know I've been around
My world came crashing down
But when I'm here with you
I'm better

When I'm here with you
I just block it out
It's cool we talk about whatever
And yeah, you know I've been around
My world came crashing down
But when I'm here with you
I'm better.
- Ashley Parker Angel
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I like baking (:
Baked blueberry muffins in the afternoon and I wanna bake somemore sometime soon.



On a random note, I hate relays because the team I'm in always loses I always make my team lose.
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On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?"

And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life! You want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But man said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."

So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

-Adapted from facebook.com
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Why, and how did things get this way?

C'mon, you've always been good at reasoning. I'm sure you can come up with a good excuse that will somehow make me forgive you. For all you did, or didn't do.

You leave me speechless, disappointed and broken.

Go away if that's what you want. Leave me alone. Don't come back to me. Ever. It'll just hurt me more. Don't apologise either. It's not gonna help, and I'm just gonna be more disappointed.

And you may ask, what am I going to do about this?

Avoid. Avoid everything. Conversation, contact, the problems, the solutions, whatever. I'm leaving them alone. That includes you don't worry.

Afterall, sooner or later I'm leaving everything behind.

Literally.
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Dang, there must be something wrong with these people.
Top scorer in MGS: 287

Hahah whaddahell that's higher than the highest in Singapore last year.

--

No training this morning.
He gave us off because he had a 200 time trial for Ting & Kang.
If Tingwen made 2.06.5 for her time trial while Tzekang made 2.08 for his timetrial, he said that we could all have morning training off.

He then looked at Ting & Kang and said, "You wanted stress? I'll give you stress!"
Wow, that was a smart way to stress people out during a time trial :P

So we all gathered at the side of the pool (As John instructed) and we were supposed to cheer Ting & Kang on like we've never cheered before. Well in the end they made the times. Ting swam 2.04.9 while Kang did a 2.06.

Something's wrong with those two people too. LOL. How in the world can they be so fastttt ):

So now I'm just blogging here cause I don't wanna update tonight.

--

My Edward Cullen no longer exists never existed.
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Here we are, seven days
And seven nights of empty tries
It's ritual, habitual
But it's never gonna work this time

We're to the point of no return
And along the way the only thing we've learned
Is how to hurt each other

I'm looking back and wondering why
It took so long to realize
That nothing's changed, it never will
All these years of standing still
And still we stay in all this pain
And nothing's gonna make it go away

I don't wanna wait another minute
Put me out of my misery
I can read your mind baby you're not in it
And we're not what we used to be
No, you wouldn't have to lie to me
If you would only let me go
And I don't wanna wait another minute to hear
Something that I already know

I know, I know, I know
Something that I already know
I know, I know, I know

So save your voice
Don't waste your breath
Can't you see we're at the end
And this goodbye, it's permanent
So wish me well and try to forget

And all the fights
And all the ways
We almost made it
But we never did
And it's finally come to this

I don't wanna wait another minute
Put me out of my misery
I can read your mind baby you're not in it
And we're not what we used to be
No, you wouldn't have to lie to me
If you would only let me go
And I don't wanna wait another minute to hear
Something that I already know

We cannot hide what we've become
So sick and tired of being numb
It's done, it's done
It's done

I don't wanna wait another minute
Put me out of my misery
I can read your mind baby you're not in it
And we're not what we used to be
No, you wouldn't have to lie to me
If you would only let me go
And I don't wanna wait another minute to hear
Something that I already know

I know, I know, I know
Something that I already know

I know, I know, I know
Something that I already know

I know, I know, I know
I know, cause I know
-Backstreet Boys


We almost made it,




















But we never did.
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Oh damn, I love this song <3

You're scared
It shows
Been there
You're not prepared to be
In love
With me
So soon cause you've been through enough to have
Something hold you back

We don't need to go that far
Let's hold on to where we are
If it's real we'll make it through
Cause all I need is you

They say
Don't waste
Your time
They're obviously blind
So let's
Forget
The words, the thoughts they put into your head
Don't give up just yet

We don't need to go that far
Let's hold on to where we are
If it's real we'll make it through
Cause all I need is you

We don't need the world right now
We got time to work it out
Hold on tight, I'll hold on too
Cause all I need is --

Baby, maybe we should start somewhere
(Gotta start somewhere)
Baby, let me in your heart
(Let me in your heart)
Before we fall apart

We don't need to go too far
Let's hold on to who we are
If it's real we'll make it through
Cause all I need is you

We don't need the world right now
We got time to work it out
Hold on tight, I'll hold on too
Cause all I need is you
All I need is you
All I need is you
- The Click Five

You're all I need. But where are you?
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Just thought I'd post a song since I'm too lazy to update.

Well, anyway there isn't much to update.
Just crazy trainings with John since Auyeong's not around & Uncle Leonard's not here anymore :/
Never thought I'd say this, but,



Ahem, *coughcough* Haha yes I miss Uncle Leonard. Hey at least he knew how to encourage people to train hard (although I always ignore your encouragement, but yeah eh I'm giving you credit okay!) LOL. Okay, so I admit that I'm someone who needs someone to push me to work hard and all, but that's not unusual, is it? Maybe I just need a little extra pushing compared to others :P

WTH I am digressing.
Let's get back to the song lyrics and I'll say goodnight.

Built To Last
I've looked for love in stranger places
But never found someone like you
Someone whose smile
Makes me feel I've been holding back
And now there's nothing I can't do

Cause this is real, and this is good
It warms the inside just like it should
But most of all
Most of all, it's built to last
It's built to last

All of our friends
Saw from the start
So why didn't we believe it too
Now look, where we are
You're in my heart now
And there's no escaping it for you

Cause this is real, and this is good
It warms the inside just like it should
But most of all
Most of all, it's built to last

Walking on the hills at night
With those fireworks and candlelight
You and I were made to get love right

Cause this is real, and this is good
It warms the inside just like it should
But most of all
Most of all, it's built to last

Cause you are the sun in my universe
Consider the best when we felt the worst
And most of all, most of all
Most of all, most of all
Most of all, most of all
It's built to last
- Melee
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Yes I KNOW I KNOW. SHOCKING. Hahahah.
Haven't gone ice skating in a longggg while and today I finally ice skated for the first time THIS YEAR D:

Went with amandayim and aliciatan.
Met at amanda's house at 1130 then after watching funny *coughcough* videos and all we finally left for fuji ice palace. Ate at macs, and we seemed like freaks because we poured all our fries into one pile then we ate from that huge pile hahaha.
Also we couldn't stop laughing at the MCR concert advertisement on the tv because there were people who dressed emo with black eyeshadow and all. Hahaha.

Okay. So finally. We ice skated. Or rather I clinged on to the wall like it was my dear life while alicia and amanda skated quite effortlessly. ARGH I sucked big time okay! ):<
Took me so long before I finally got the courage to let go of the wall and actually ice skate across the rink. LOL. I'm sucha failure :/

Good thing is, Alicia was the first to fall. Well actually she was the only one who fell (But not really counted since I was hanging on to the wall for like half the time) but HEY at least I didn't fall.

So many pro skaters/hockey players just cut across our paths while we were skating! SO ANNOYING. Imagine if we weren't good enough to control our balance. We might just fall down and then they would like skate OVER us. Just like that. Then we might have had to say goodbye to our fingers. EEEW but yeah so many people fell because of the pro skaters! Grrrrr.

Had lots of fun :D Skated for like 4 hours then we went to take one round of neos (it was the best neos I'd ever taken!) and we sang our favourite song all throughout the outing.

OOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooo (:

Whee now I'm home after dinner and everything.
Will probably post the pics tmr because poor amanda's too tired to upload them.
Hahah for now, ciao!

CLICK FIVE <3
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Whoah today was a hectic day! D:

Training in the morning, then I went home.
I DIED-ED FOR DRYLAND PUHLEASE
& The set didn't want to be easy today ):<
Didn't swim too badly though.

Went home then I started mass messaging carolynkwok and joiechan. LOL.
Left for cine. Took LRT then MRT. Heh. Met shaun joie at bishan.
Then we met marc jiayuan at cine. Hahah omg marc looked so emo! ><
Met carolyn stephsim. Then we were arguing over what movie to watch.

It was like,
JIAYUAN: LET'S WATCH THE BEE MOVIE! IT'S LIKE HOW COOL. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO WATCH IT!!!!
SHAUN: STARDUSTTTT.. BUT ALYSSA WATCH ALREADY ):<<<
CAROLYN & STEPH: WE DON'T CARE WE'RE WATCHING BRATZZZZZ. HAHAHAHA.
ME: I WANT BEOWULF! CAN WE TRY GETTING TICKETS FOR IT? (It was NC16)

Hahah in the end the guys decided to be damn nice and watch bratz. HAHAHAH.
Zhenren's mom called me up. She was like, "Hey this is Alyssa right? Yeah zhenren is meeting you right? This is his mom can you help me tell him that he left his phone in the car and that I'll be waiting at the place where I dropped him off just now. Yup thanks."

O_O Er okay. Hahah. In the end he went back to get his phone before he met us. He said he used a public phone to call. HAHAHAHAH :D

Went our separate ways for breakfast/lunch then we met at the cinema before our show. Hahah marc and jia are damn funny I tell you. They were like jumping all over the cinema. They ran up the seats hahaha it was an eye opener for me :D

Then we just randomly sat somewhere (I honestly didn't know which seats we chose) and we sat all over the place. Or rather until the woman came in and told marc and jia to sit where they were supposed to. Hahahah.

The movie was er. Heh. *Commentless* Quite bimbotic. No, I meant. SUPER bimbotic. Uhm. Okay I should stop here. LAWL.

After that we took MRT then bus to carolyn's house. WALKED SO FAR IN. Haha! Watched like the beginning 5 mins of Scary Movie One then I got phone calls bothering me like nobody's business. URGH. My dad was scolding me and stuff about how he didn't approve of me going out in the first place and that he won't let me go ANYWHERE unless I train properly and stuff. STUPID ZHENREN PONNED TRAINING I HATE HIM OMGWTF!#$% Argh. So unfair. My dad won't even let me off for one session.

Anyway I called for a cab then I made my way to toa payoh. Luckily I was on time :/ If not I would have been dead meat. If my dad didn't kill me, John would. *Shudders* Hahah I hate my life. Wait I don't even have a life -.-

THANKFULLY, I trained superduper fantabulously well today. 4x500 dive 400fs max @ 95% +100mod. But whaddahell lah the "@95%" thingo was just RUBBISH. We sprant like shit lah. Lol. Did 5.08, 5.04, 5.00 and 5.00. Not bad considering for someone as lousy as me. Yay (:

Because of my wonderful training, my dad didn't scold me for ANYTHING at all after training. Haha! The wonders of training well. Hoho means I can do anything I want and hang out all day long AS LONG AS I train properly at the end of the day. Whooooo today must be my lucky day.

& To make tmr a lucky day too, I should probably get going now.
Au Revoir <3
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LINKIN PARK ROCK CONCERT!

& They say a picture says a thousand words.
Here's more than one picture ;D


^Look at how many people there were who paid for the standing tickets D:


^Wow, full house!


^I LOVE THOSE BLINDING LIGHTS.


^Colour blast!


^LINKIN PARKKKKKK


^Zoomed in but BLUR !#$%^


^I just couldn't stop trying to take pics.


^Love the backdrops.


^Whoots, and what did I say about the lights? AWESOME.

They sang:

• Papercut
• Crawling
• In The End
• Don't Stay
• One Step Closer
• Somewhere I Belong
• Faint
• Breaking The Habit
• From The Inside
• Numb
• Given Up [Starting song!]
• The Little Things Give You Away [It sounds so much better live!]
• Bleed It out
• Shadow Of The Day
• What I've Done
• No More Sorrow
• In Pieces

I think that was it.
I am so going for another concert :D

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"Ok. Then let's proceed to MR. SHIT number three. he's quite unthinkable, a weird, very unpredictable behaviour erm... there's quite a age gap to MRS. SHIT. and well, all the COE gals should be able to guess who that guy is cause he just gave us chocolates from marks and spencer that day... and apparently it's for christmas! well, quite suspicious cause number one: a guy DOESN'T give a damn about our existence and not to mention bringing us glad tidings before christmas even comes."

"Well, victim 1 was like: maybe the expiry date is coming and he can't finish it so he give it to us. but the expiry is like at 2007 feb... so..."

"Then victim 2 said that: maybe he wanted to give a girl he likes it but he have to give it to all of us to aviod suspicion, right? (but everyone was suspecting: alyssa...)"

"Then victim 3 was saying the most ridiculous thing that you can ever think of, and maybe it's the effect of reading too much harry potter books and about their potions class: maybe he added love potion into the chocolates and wanted us to like... erm... you know what does it meant. well, its better to believe, so i decided to let my brothers try it out first before digging into the chocolates... yup. and apparently, that wasn't the case at all. cause by afternoon, the chocolates were gone and most of us didn't experience anything funny at all..."

I found this highly amusing. I never knew sele actually posted this about me last year december during christmas. And the thing is, I remember perfectly well who gave us marks and spencers chocolates last christmas...
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Hahah! Today I woke up feeling terribly energetic and out of sorts. Damn, it's been a severely long time since I felt this way. Hehs.





If you didn't notice that something EVERYTHING was wrong with the post above,
THEN SCREW YOU.



Fuck
The
World
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Everybody's always talking at me
Everybody's trying to get in my head
I wanna listen to my own heart talking
I need to count on myself instead

Did you ever
Lose yourself to get what you want
Did you ever
Get on a ride and wanna get off
Did you ever
Push away the ones you should've held close
Did you ever let go
Did you ever not know

I'm not gonna stop
That's who I am
I'll give it all I got
That is my plan
Will I find what I lost, you know you can
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on it
Bet on me

I wanna make it right
That is the way
To turn my life around
Today is the day
Am I the type of guy who means what I say
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on it

How will I know if there's a path worth taking
Should I question every move I make
With all I've lost, my heart is breaking
I don't wanna make the same mistakes

Did you ever
Doubt your dream will ever come true
Did you ever
Blame the world but never blame you
I will never
Try to live a lie again
I don't wanna win this game if I can't play it my way

I'm not gonna stop
That's who I am (Who I am)
I'll give it all I got
That is my plan (That's my plan)
Will I find what I lost
You know you can (You know you can)
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on it
Bet on me

I wanna make it right
That is the way
To turn my life around
Today is the day
Am I the type of guy who means what I say
Bet on it, bet on it,bet on it, bet on it

Oh, hold up
Give me room to think
Bring it on down
Gotta work on my swing
Gotta do my own thing
Hold up
It's no good at all
To see yourself and not recognize your face
Out on my own
It's such a scary place
Ooh
The answers are all inside of me
All I gotta do
Is believe

I'm not gonna stop
Not gonna stop till I get my shot
That's who I am
That is my plan
Will I end up on top again
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, you can
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on it
Bet on Me

I wanna make it right
That is the way
To turn my life around
Today is the day
Am I the type of guy who means what I say
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on it
You can bet on me
- Zac Efron; High school muscial 2

Love this song. It shall be my inspiration for the next 1093281674319824379 months.
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Up and out today! (:

Training in the morning was plain horrendous. I didn't know we could seriously choose what we wanted to do for dive max. I would have chosen ANYTHING but freestyle (Yes I'd even choose breast stroke if I had to) without having to think for a second. URGH. So annoying.

That aside,
Watched stardust in the afternoon! With eve and sele. Sah didn't go ):<
We bought subway and bubble tea (Damn I'm craving for one to quench my thirst again!) and smuggled it into the cinema. Haha. It was hard eating subway in the dark. Can't see anything. Thankfully I didn't spill anything. Poor sele ):

Okay a brief review on stardust:
OMG STARDUST WAS GOOD. It seemed story-based, as in it was totally fictional..

But at the same time what was happening in the movie was very realistic. The characteristics of all the characters.. The selfishness of human kind, the extent to which someone would go to for the sake of love, and also the greed for fame and position. Ohmy all there. Hahah. It was good.

Movie plot had many twists (More than I expected) and I got fooled almost every time! Some twists were humorous. There was a point where I thought the movie had ended because the issue was resolved but no, they proved me wrong. Hahah damn. Nice playing around with the story line down there.

Y'all should give it a go ;D
Kristian Dustant or whatever that guy's name is in the movie IS SO GOOD LOOKING. Well at least I thought so after he had a change of hairstyle :/

Okay okay. Back to me talking about what we did. We walked around AMK hub looking at random stuff. Eve and I got sele to try on this shirt and skirt and DAMN she looked super nice but she wasn't used to it -.- Sigh sele, SIGH. Hahah. After rounds and rounds of meaningless window shopping I went for massage and they went to j8. End of story.

Lol how could a story end just like that?! Well I went to meet them at j8 after massage and they bought candy from minitoons! Hawhaw it's so sinful I know. But hey who can resist such temptation? Shared with them and we walked to RI pool cause eve had something to pass to a friend of hers in ACE. Lol. The sight of pool water freaked me out but thankfully I made it alive out of there (:

Then we walked aimlessly (again) around j8. Hmm, we planned to have dinner together but my parents called up and said we were gonna have dinner. So I accompanied eve and sele to buy their dinner then they went home while I stayed around there for a little longer to wait for my father to come pick me up.

It was quite amusing you know, because I had to do 2 surveys (Sort of) at j8. First, when I just reached, I got approached by this guy quite awkwardly and then I had to do this survey with his partner (This female student from NTU) and they were working part time. She told me about some saving thing and I figured she was quite shocked when she found out I was 13. Her expression gave her away -.-

After I "sent off" eve and sele, I got approached by another girl who was aiming to sell 200 pens at $2 each for this New Apprentice Programme. It was sorta like the show on channel 5 and I was so nice as to buy the pen at $2. Hahah. I don't regret it. Can you imagine, trying to sell 200 pens at $2 each just for some programme!? Damn, so I thought I'd just help her out. (Oh, and I know she never expected me to be 13 years old. Because when she asked me how old I was and after telling her, she went, "Oh my goodness you're only 13?! I expected you to be around my age! I'm 16!"

Oh sometimes I wished I weren't that tall :/

Overall,
GOOD DAY.

Hope you people out there have had a good day too.
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Ahahahahah retarded advertisement. Watched it again and again and again and again but it doesn't seem to lose the humour does it. LOL.



Enjoy :D
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Hi J_ _ n. I hope you are reading this :D

*CHANGE ALL THE SHE TO HE. CHANGE ALL THE GIRL TO MAN.

She's so lovely
I love the way she fills her clothes
She looks just like them girls in vouge
I love the way she plays it cool
I think that she is beautiful

She's so lovely, she's so lovely
She's so lovely, she's so lovely
She's so lovely, she's so lovely
She's so lovely

She's pretty
A fittie
She got a boyfriend though and thats a pity
She's 30 turn 13
Ain't that the age a girl gets really dirty

I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
How we'll make it through this
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know

I love the way she bites her lip
I love the way she shakes them hips
I love the way she makes me drool
I think that she is beautiful

She's so lovely, she's so lovely
She's so lovely, she's so lovely
She's so lovely, she's so lovely
She's so lovely

A stunner
I want her
Was she this fit when she was 10 years younger
Come see me discreatlly
She said she's got a trick or two to teach me

I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
How we'll make it through this
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
How we'll make it through this
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
How we'll make it through this
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know

I think that you are lovely
I think that you are lovely
I think that you are lovely
I think that you are lovely
I think that you are lovely
I think that you are lovely
I think that you are lovely
I think that you are beautiful

She's so lovely, she's so lovely
She's so lovely, she's so lovely
She's so lovely, she's so lovely
She's so lovely

I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
How we'll make it through this
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
How we'll make it through this
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
How we'll make it through this
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
How we'll make it through this
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
How we'll make it through this
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
- Scouting for Girls

We know you’re lovely (:
LOVE Alyyy & Debb & Sele & Sahh :D

and if you bothered decoding this, you just wasted 5 seconds of your life. (this was my idea. The song was Debb's idea.)

Inside joke :D
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Was tagged by Alicia Tan. So here goes! ;D
(I read her quiz, it was hilarious. She didn't know what 'hooked up' meant. I shall ohsokindly inform her on msn another time. Yay me.)

T R U T H F U L L Y
1. Do you like anyone?
- Yes. Whaaat, it's the truth! (:

2. Do they know it?
- Uhmm. Yeah. I'm being truthful here, be grateful.

3. Simple or complicated?
- Hmm, simple? I guess, but going to be complicated soon )':

IN - T H E - L A S T - M O N T H - H A V E- Y O U
4. Had sex?
- (Coughs, then takes a deep breath) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

5. Bought something?
- Well, DUH!

6. Gotten sick?
- Doubt so?

7. Been hugged?
- Yup (:

8. Felt stupid?
- I feel stupid all the time, heheh.

9. Talked to an ex?
- Don't have an ex ;D Yay.

10. Missed someone?
- YES I miss you terribly )':

11. Failed a test?
- YES STUPID CHINESE *($%^&!*#$@#*&^$!!

12. Danced?
- Nope. I don't dance ;D

13. Gotten your hair cut?
- In the past month, nope. I cut my hair in like, September.

14. Lied?
- Yes I lie ALL THE TIME.

U N I Q U E
15. Nervous habits?
- I look at my feet and I play with my fingernails. And I stutter. Bad.

16. Are you double jointed?
- Okay now it's my turn to confess. What does this mean -.-

17. Can you roll your tongue?
- No. OH HOW JEALOUS I AM.

18. Can you raise one eyebrow?
- Yup. Yipee! (:

H A V E - Y O U - E V E R'S
19. Said "I Love you"?
- UH HUH :D You won't want to know to who ;DD

20. Given money to a homeless person?
- I feel guilty now. Thanks -.-

21. Smoked?
- NO I HATE SMOKERS. And smoking of course.

22. Waited all night for a phone call?
- Not really. But I wait almost every night for smses.

23. Snuck out?
- I think so. Hahah.

24. Sat and looked at the stars?
- I wish I could. With someone special before.. )':

M A N N E R S
25. Do you swear/curse?
- I'm feeling guilty again.

26. Do you ever spit?
- NO. Gross.

27. You cook your own food?
- No, for fear of food poisoning :/

28. You do your own chores?
- Only when I get scolded ;D

29. You like beef jerky?
- What in the world is that!?

30. You're happy with your life?
- Still thinking about it.

31. You own a dog?
- Nah.

32. You spend your money wisely?
- Define 'wisely'.

33. Do you like to swim?
- Yeah I do. But uhm things get complicated down at the pool.

34. When you get bored do you call a friend?
- Very seldom. I text them.

35. Sleep in a bed with the opposite sex?
- Nope.

36. Hooked up in the woods?
- Nope -.-

37. Drank a bottle of alcohol by yourself?
- I hate alcohol.

38. Hooked up in the shower?
- I haven't even hooked up before sheesh!

39. Been Dumped?
- I. DO. NOT. HAVE. AN. EX. And even if I do I REFUSE TO BE DUMPED. Hahahah.

40. Stolen money from a friend?
- No! I'm very honest okay.

41. Slept naked?
- NOOOOOO STUPID QUESTION ):<

42. Been in a fist fight?
- Don't think so. More like verbal fights? ;D

43. Had a crush on a teacher?
- NO! Who would have a crush on Mr Lau man!? (SMIRKS)

45. Been on an airplane?
- YES! AND WILL BE ON ONE SOON AGAIN but for sad reasons ):

46. Slept all day?
- Can't. Don't have a choice. But if I could, I just might.

47. Missed someone so much it hurt?
- All the time )':

48. Fallen asleep during school?
- All the time :D

49. Been lonely?
- Most of the time ):

50.Cheated in a game?
- I haven't played a game in ages.

(ALICA CLAIRE TAN HWEI WERN WHERE IS Q51!?)

52. Been in a car accident?
- Wish I was. Then I'd just die and forget everything.. except you ;D

53. Had detention?
- No. Nearly did, though.

54. Missed your first love?
- Dots.

55. Cried yourself to sleep?
- All the time :/

56. Sung in the shower?
- I shower at the pool.. Only tingwen sings. Heh.

57. Kissed a complete stranger?
- Do I look that crazy to you? If your answer is yes, then you thought wrong.

58. Laughed so hard you cried?
- YESSSSS I LAUGH TILL MY STOMACH HURTS TOO :D

59. Regretted hurting someone?
- Not really. Whenever I hurt someone, it's usually INTENTIONAL.

60. Regretted loving someone?
- No. I might just start regretting.

DONE.
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Few points to say.

• I am so sick. And so tired. Of trying and trying. I mean, what difference does it make? So what if I try. Does it look like it ever helps at all? Yeah maybe you don't care, but have you ever thought about how I felt about it, about giving it my all but still lag behind? Well just so you know, that feeling is horrible. I hate it and I don't see the point in trying or giving my best any longer.
  
  
• You know what, I think I should just give it all up. If nothing I do is gonna help, then maybe I'm just not suited for the whole thing, y'know? No point forcing me or saying that I have potential or whatever crap it is you tell me these days. I'm not falling for it again. Never. Ever. Why was I so foolish to stay behind when I could just leave all this while? All this commitment, all those tears I cried, nothing was worth it. And thanks for letting me know.
  
  
• When I don't try, it's because I've been trying all this while and whenever I do, nothing changes. I mean, I still don't make cycles. So what if I give my all? How long will I hold on? 50m? 100m? It doesn't make any sense at all to me. It's just so unfair. Look at others. They slack but still make time. I sprint but I miss cycles and for that, what do I get? A scolding. This whole one year plus I've spent with you, I've come to realise that I'm never gonna be as good as the others. No matter how hard I try. So obviously, I stop trying.
  
  
• And of course, I have people who run me down over there. Poking fun at me just because I don't make cycles especially when it's terribly EASY for them to. Saying that it's okay for them to lose to anyone, EXCEPT ME. Like hello?! Imagine how I felt when you told me that. Pushing the blame to me whenever you get scolded. "Oh, you were holding the same times as me? No wonder I got scolded! Wahlao!" So what you're trying to imply by saying that to me? That I'm the slowest person on earth so if you hold the same times as me, it means you were slow and that's why you got scolded? Haha, thanks alot man. I mean, that made me feel a whole lot better about myself. And of course, the irony of them saying "Eh later go slower kay? I pace you" and the next thing you know is that they do a 1.08 sprint leaving you behind at 1.15 pace.
  
  
• Oh yes, also coaches who don't understand me. Designing the same type of sets for every training session. Nice job. I mean, so it's like if I can't make the set for one day, I won't be able to make the set for like forever. Because the set is practically the same everyday. Wow, that helps. Alot. And you don't really care if I lag behind, do you? You don't even bother to encourage me. That's very nice of you. And just to inform you, you don't have to give up on me. Cause I've given up on myself already.

I'm done.

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I think this is damn bloody unbelievably indescribably miraculously shockingly accurate D:

YOUR PERSONAL PROFILE -
At this particular time you are perhaps setting yourself too high a target and so you are living in the land of 'make believe'. It would also seem that you have been bitterly disappointed in the past and you are at a stage where you feel that you can trust nobody. You would like to forget it all and turn your back on the past and start anew.

At this time you 'need to be needed' and again you 'need to need'. You have had this feeling for some time now and you are looking for someone who could share a close bond in an atmosphere of shared intimacy. You have the belief that with the right person you could conquer the world.

Everyone, sooner or later gets that feeling that one has been cut off from reality, cut off from everything that's going on around them. It usually happens when there is a complete lack of understanding and co-operation - be it from friends, family or loved ones. So what can one do about it? Instead of pondering as to what the future may hold, do something different. Make a cup of coffee. Have a shower. Read a book. Watch your favourite soap opera. Because as soon as you become involved in something different, the original disassociated feelings will dissipate.

Recently everything seems to have gone wrong and so you are experiencing considerable stress and anxiety due to mental conflict. A continuous case of 'Should I?' or 'Shouldn't I?'. At this particular moment in time you feel as if you have reached the end of your tether and it seems impossible to ever rectify the situation and so you have decided, perhaps quite unrealistically, to postpone making any further decisions. Disappointment and unfulfilled hopes have given rise to despondency. This conflict between hope and necessity is creating considerable pressure. Instead of resolving this by facing up to making the essential decision, you are likely to immerse yourself in the pursuit of trivialities as an escape route.

The tensions and stresses that you are experiencing at this time are, you feel, beyond your capabilities or your reserves of strength to cope with. You feel inadequate and in a constant state of anxiety.You are attempting to escape from this situation into a secure environment in which you may be permitted to relax and recover, free from outside interference.

Y'all should go try it out.
Click here ;D

Back to surfing blogskins.
Man utd will own arsenal's ass later. Just you wait and see.
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Hahah WE GOT TO PLAY POLO TODAYYY :D
Training was surprisingly easyyy whoo.

Programme
4x400 on 6.00min
1) free
2) free last 50 fly (I survived it and I made time by 20 seconds!)
3) free last 50 back (I liked this one.)
4) free last 50 breast (I hated this :P)

12x50 explode on 60secs
1) pull
2) kick

3x200 on 4.30min
Dive hard 100 b/f - 100 mod
*Aim for 6secs within PB
(I did backstroke. If I did free I might as well just go die.)

300 mod

And that was it! Hahah! Slack huh ;D
POLO WAS HOW FUN :D
Well that's cause my team won? LOL.

My team had:
- Zhenren! He made playing loads easier cos he was damn pro.
- Sarahlai! Eh she was pro too!
- SCOTTLAI! The wonderful goal-scorer
- Illyas! He made a good keeper. Better than joseph anyway :P
- Joseph! Hahah he missed loads of shots but he still contributed :D

Yeah we won! Whoo hoo! We actually won Cameron's team lah. Wheee.
Trashed them what, 5-2? Muahahah.

And I scored the VERY LAST GOAL. Thank me. And here I tell you 'you're welcome'.
Hahahah.

Gotta go for massage now. Aching like shit :P
Sele's gonna die on monday. Grrrrr.
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Stranger than your sympathy
And this is my apology
I killed myself from the inside out
And all my fears have pushed you out

And I wished for things that I don’t need
All I wanted
And what I chased won’t set me free
All I wanted
And I get scared but I’m not crawlin’ on my knees
Oh, yeah
Everything’s all wrong, yeah
Everything’s all wrong, yeah
Where the hell did I think I was?

And stranger than your sympathy
Take these things, so I don’t feel
I’m killing myself from the inside out
And now my head’s been filled with doubt

We’re taught to lead the life you choose
(all I wanted)
You know your love’s run out on you
(all I wanted)
And you can’t see when all your dreams aren’t coming true
Oh, yeah
It’s easy to forget, yeah
When you choke on the regrets, yeah
Who the hell did I think I was?

And stranger than your sympathy
And all these thoughts you stole from me
And I’m not sure where I belong
And no where’s home and no more wrong

And I was in love with things
I tried to make you believe I was
And I wouldn’t be the one to kneel
before the dreams I wanted
And all the dark and all the lies
were all the empty things disguised as me
Mmm, yeah

Stranger than your sympathy
Stranger than your sympathy
Mmm hmmm mmm
- Goo Goo Dolls

Now, Quiz time! Thanks to Marie who tagged me to do this ;D

1. Name a friend who's name starts with "S"
- I'll name two since they're both nice people! (: SARAHLAI & SELE :D

2. 4th person on your missed calls
- Deborah Chua! Hehs.

3. Last text msg you received
- All right. Good. (My math tuition teacher when I told him my results :X)

4. Do you chew on straws?
- Yes, pretty often :/ Whoopsies.

5. Do you have curly hair?
- Well, tonnes of people thought I rebonded my hair?! Which means, NO.

6. Who's the coolest person in your life?
- Ohgosh, this is a killer question. So many possible answers! D:

7. What's the last thing you ate?
- DINNERRRR.

8. What's the last thing you've said to someone and who was it?
- Is that J. Lo? (Dad. He was watching some movie on tv.)

9. Do you watch TV?
- No. I watch television PROGRAMS (cope from Marie who coped from Mandykhoo haha!)

10. What should you be doing right now?
- SLEEPING! zzz.. And preparing to die for tmr morn's trg, of course.

11. Do you have a nickname?
- Oh, I have tonnes. Some examples: Lielie, PHOENIX FLOWER (Omg lah. Thanks alot aliciaFONG), and (My fave one) Aly! :D

12. Do you believe in love at first sight?
- Hmm. Not really?

13. Who's the youngest in the family?
- ME! Is that supposed to be a good thing..?

14. Where was the last place you slept other than your home?
- Uhmm. >< Let's see. In the car, and at school. Hehs.

15. Who do you trust the most?
- Depends on the issue :P

16. Do you think people who come up with brain dead quizzes are crying for help in some twisted way?
- Uh, I guess so? Hahah wth stupid question -.-

LAST

person you saw:
- Maddie.

Talked to on the phone:
- Dad

Hugged:
- Can't rmb. My classmate?

Texted:
- Is there an 'Not telling' option to choose? ;D

5 people to do this
1. Amandakhoo!
2. Amandayim!
3. Aliciatan!
4. Debbchua!
5. Eveng!

Haha that's all. I think that was a super time waster but ohwell, wasn't exactly having much to talk about on msn and I didn't want to watch tv. Was also feeling pretty boredddd.

On another note, I am happy with my results. Hey, at least they improved and although it's a far cry from the perfect 4.0, I don't slash my wrist (saying this figuratively) just because of that ;D

I feel happy. But training just makes me depressed. Hope I get a better feel of the water tmr. Then I can play polo with easeeeee (:

John's coming back soon )':
Blog again Die another day.
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Ahahaha today's training SUCKED BIG TIME but fortunately things like this happen.

Scene: In the toilet
(Debb and I have filled our bottles and were drinking endurox)

Debb and I:
(Drinking two identical pink coloured drink)

Sarahlai:
Eh are both of you drinking the same thing? What is it that y'all are drinking?

Debb:
(With a superrr duperrr harsh tone of SARCASM and nothing else)

Debb:
What? Oh no no no, we're drinking two different things.

Me:
Hahah.

Debb:
Alyssa's drinking.. Uhmm, Endu..RAIN and I'm drinking.. Endu..STORM!

Sarahlai:
(With an innocent look)

Sarahlai:
Really!? What's the difference!?

Debb and I:
HAHAHAHAHAHA :D

That made training suck less. I suppose :/

LAST DAY OF SCHOOL TMR AND I'LL SAY GOODBYE FOREVER AND EVER (:
And this time I'm not kidding. Trust me ;D
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