Funny phrases given by Theresa...

1. I will strangle you with a cordless phone.
2. Im in shape. Round is a shape, isn't it?
3. I saw Elvis- he sat between me and Bigfoot while we were on the UFO!
4. Operator! Give me the number for 911!
5. Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else.
6. If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.
7. I believe in dragons, fairies, good men and other mythical creatures!
8. I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.
9. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.
10. Are children who act in rated R movies allowed to see them?
11. Never say oops in the operating room.
12. The pistol of a flower is its only protections against insects.
13. Don't steal, the government hates competition.
14. People said i was dumb, but i proved them.
15. Don't drink and drive, you may spill the drink.
16. I thought pigs lived in farms, what are you doing here?!?
17. I sat back looking at the stars and began to think.. where the HECK is my roof?!
18. Hate: A special kind of love given to people who suck.
19. My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
20. A conclusion is the part where you got tired of thinking.
21. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
22. Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.
23. Illiterate? Write For Help.
24. If you die, I'll kill you!
25. I did my homework! I just forgot to write it down.


H.A.H.A

Posted by alyssaLIE;
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